Are you ready for some equality?

This post appears at Libertarian Home with an incredibly misleading picture.

The Superbowl is a noisy, bewildering event where, over the course of what feels like an eternity, teams of men dressed like medieval knights on a ‘dress down Friday’ from the waist up and Freddy Mercury on any given Friday night from the waist down, gather in a field to kick a ball/throw a ball/catch a ball/drop a ball/run a couple of meters with a ball and then stop doing anything for about five minutes, until, at long last, one side loses as much interest as the rest of us and gives up, leaving the winners standing about in their great big T-shirts and skintight sparkly trousers while roughly €8bn worth of fireworks go off, and fans of both teams go down the pub to drink to forget that they paid all that money for a ticket and had to use up a holiday day to boot. Football! Catch the fever!

But things just got interesting. The New England Patriots – who will play against another team this Sunday – have been up to no good. It seems they were secretly deflating the balls used in their previous matches. As a result, games were played where all the balls involved were not equal.

The outing of the Patriots for letting the air out of footballs has led to an outpouring of outrage from media outlets. And with good reason: games were played where the balls were not equal. Some balls were more inflated than others which is unfair, especially to the fans expecting to see a game where all the balls were inflated an equal amount.

Hard questions need to be asked and much-needed lessons need to be learned before we can draw a line under this. Are the Patriots just the tip of the iceberg? Just how many games are taking place where balls are unequally pumped up? What does this psi inequality say about football, the men who play it, and the men who watch it?

The bottom line is that games being played with balls of an unequal level of inflation is wrong. This is the twenty-first century. All balls must be inflated an equal amount. No excuses. Let’s be perfectly clear: unequal ball pressure is a cancer in our society and it must be stopped.

[A correspondent complains that this is a “silly” piece as “no one is saying what matters is the differences in air pressure between the balls”. Also the piece is “superficial,” “lacking even the hint of a subtext”. The criticisms are printed here with approval. R.]

Twitter @StrictlyLiberal

Google+ Rocco Bogpaper


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